Really.. this one just had to make the blog hall of fame. I can't help it. Its horrible, its gross, its going to be hilarious one day. Blake has been potty training for a week or two now and he pees like a champ. A real champ. He sits, he stands, he pees on my car, the fence, the brush pile I need to clean up.. the boy is like a walking sprinkler. This is all fabulous and I have a huge stock of gummy bears to keep the motivation going. The other thing. ahem.. numero dos.. not so much. He is very specific to only do it in the privacy of his own room, at naptime when no one is around to see.. or smell.. and well.. its very secretive. He is like the poop mafia. There is a like only a small cell that knows about it, a few stuffed lions and a black lab. One time he ran around diaper free and when the moment came.. he started screaming and sobbing and shouting "I NEEEEEEED A DIAPER". Needless to say... I was scrubbing the floor. So the boy who never poops had a birthday party today. We had a great time, enjoyed visiting with our neighbors, and they were so sweet they even offered up their fence to Blake for pee purposes. This is all well and good.. until he ran to the fence and Steve said "Did he just say.. " I stopped Steve right there, no Blake would never discuss let alone think about poop in a public place. at a party. at a friends birthday party. Right? umm... So I ran over to assist his aim and he said "I have to go poo poo". I still didn't believe it so I checked.. and sure enough.. Needless to say i freaked out. I screamed for Steve in that whispery but firm, get your heiny over here and deliver me from this mess- kinda way. The kind that only wives can do so well. So he came over and just kind of watched. I realized the crisis, and pulled up the swim trunks, ran into the house as fast as I could (there was no time to ask permission, their yard , their VERY PARTY was AT RISK!!!) I threw Blake on the potty. We made it! (mostly). Well enough. Good enough to get the toy Calliou prize that has been sitting on my fridge for two months making my house look junky. ... Now... just four more times and the top of my fridge will be all clear. And heres to hoping we EVER get invited anywhere in this neighborhood again!

Oh sweet Jesus, its been forever since I have blogged and according to bloggers new layout (which took me ten minutes to learn to post !) , I have no views anyhow so I suppose it doesn't matter. For a long time I felt like I had nothing or witty to say. First we went through a very traumatic and high risk pregnancy. By the grace of God our sweet girl arrived healthy and needing much less intervention than originally anticipated. After that I felt like a tornado had hit. Hello friends?! Why didn't anyone tell me how hard the jump from one to two kids is?! All i heard was "The jump from 2 to 3 is so easy".. That should have been my first clue! I was in a hormone crazed, sleep deprived, breastmilk producing, toddler chasing, diaper changing frenzy and i thought i had literally lost my mind. I thought I was going to have to have Steve's Mom and my Mom move in with me full time. No, not to take care of the kids.. to take care of me! I am pretty sure I didn't shower the first few weeks.  
This brings me to Thursday. Ah.. beautiful Thursday, a sunny day, high 80's .. all was well. I decided to pack up my little cherubs and head to the zoo. But I cleverly decided I would outsmart those money grubbers and park on the street. I carefully perused the spaces and made a crazy U turn to get one, all the while warning my temperamental 3 year old of my plan, lest he think there was a change of plan and he had to release Jekyll.. or Hyde.. whichever the crazy one was. I parked the car, singlehandedly pulled my double stroller out of my trunk, popped it open and felt ready to rock the zoo. My hair was styled , I was rocking the short shorts...and get this.. my fingernails and toenails MATCHED! (I can hear your sighs of envy). We started our march to the zoo and I saw a man on a bike coming up behind us, I hurried Blake along and told him to keep up. The man slowed down and said "those aren't your kids are they?" At first I was puzzled... "Uh, no sir, I just picked them up on the other block and I figured I would play house with them..". Anyhow he went on to ask me how old I was and then I realized his agenda. No.. wait, I didn't. At this point I was still flattered. He went on to say "you are gorgeous, you are really beautiful". I said thanks and smiled,  ( i told you I was rocking the short shorts and the nailpolish) Then he started asking me how old I was and telling me his life story (mind you we have only walked 5 houses together). He keeps stopping to tell me how beautiful I am and then we crossed that threshold into weird.. you know, where you want to think someone is nice, but its too freakin late, they let the Cuckoo outta the clock and theres no going back. He starts telling me he is only 35, then changes his mind and tells me he is old enough to be my dad. Then he asks if I am married. I assure him I am, and he tells me how lucky my husband is. Yes man on bicycle.. its too bad I am married, because I really like old men on bicycles. Especially the non showered variety. I would love to get some stepkids who are the same age as me too. At this point I pick up the pace and I am dragging Blake along behind me and we retreat into the zoo where I think we have found amnesty from unwanted attacks. 

Well-- we  sat down for lunch. Let me preface this by saying I am pretty afraid of birds when they get close to me. So we are sitting at a table, I am feeding Kenzie her prunes (thats a whole nother saga..) and imploring Blake to eat his sandwich. All of the sudden out of no where three seagulls descend upon our table squawking. They PICKED UP Blake's sandwich and carried it away!!! IT was on A BUN!!! thats HEAVY!! I did what any mother would.. I got up and jumped about three feet backward. About five more gulls come down and they start fighting over who gets the sandwich. Kenzie is crying, Blake is screaming "WHAT YOU DOIN WITH MY FOOD", and I am about to go find the looney on the bike to protect me from the birds. phew... we packed up and ran to a more secluded table as fast as we could. The moral of the story is.. dont be mean to the wierdo on the bike, because you might need him someday..